


Birthday

by Imbecamiel



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Gen, JARVIS - Freeform, Not actually crack, Rhodey is an exasperated dad to Tony, Tony is a proud dad to JARVIS, breaking into houses drunk, only not actually drunk on alcohol just insanely sleep-deprived
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-04
Updated: 2014-06-04
Packaged: 2018-02-03 10:31:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1741487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imbecamiel/pseuds/Imbecamiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony has something important he wants to tell Rhodey. Really, really important. Not miles separating them, nor locked doors, nor insane amounts of sleep deprivation, shall stand in his way.</p><p>Okay, so the sleep deprivation might wind up hampering him a little bit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Birthday

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for [Elenafic over on AvengersGen](http://avengersgen.livejournal.com/3373.html?thread=404269#t404269), who wanted gen take on the fandom trope of "character 1 gets drunk and breaks into character 2's apartment, romance ensues" showing Tony and Rhodey's friendship. Because the story got out of hand and I had a reading comprehension fail it turned into more "early days" than the actual start of their friendship, but there ya go. It was a fun little change of pace from the last few stories I've been working on, at any rate. ^^

Rhodey was just about to get into bed when he heard a soft _thump_ from the direction of the living room. He froze, listening. A second later the noise was followed by another, slightly louder thud and a scraping sound. Someone was trying to get into his apartment.

 

Kneeling beside the bed, he tapped the code into his under-the-bed gun safe and withdrew his weapon. He turned off the bedroom light before easing the bedroom door open and moving out into the hallway.

 

Gun at the ready, he leaned out to look around the corner. Light from the street lamps spilled in through the now-open window. He cursed silently. Had he left it unlatched? He thought he’d checked…

 

A figure was standing just inside the window, silhouetted against the light outside.

 

Reaching around the corner, Rhodey flicked on the living room lights, simultaneously raising his gun to level it at the intruder.

 

“Hold it right— _Tony?_ _”_ He stared incredulously at the man for half a second before lowering the gun.

“Oww…” Tony had raised a hand in front of his eyes, blinking rapidly in the bright light. “I think you’ve permanently destroyed my night vision.”  

 

“Believe me, that is the least of my worries right now. I could have _shot_ you. Why were you climbing in my window?”

 

“The door was locked.”

 

Right. Because that was perfectly valid reasoning in Tony Stark’s world, apparently. 

“And you didn’t think to ring the bell? Or _knock?”_

 

“I thought I’d surprise you?”

 

“Well, I’m surprised. What are you doing here?”

 

“I’ve been working on something, something really big, and I finally had a breakthrough, and I—I just had to _tell_ _someone,_ so—“

 

“And there wasn’t anyone closer?” He shook his head incredulously.

 

“No one worth telling...”

 

“You ever heard of a telephone?”

 

Tony gave him an impatient look. “This is too important for a phone call!”

 

He stiffened, dread knotting his stomach. “Are you in some kind of trouble?”

 

“Nooo….” Tony drew the word out, as if considering the possibility even as he said it, before repeating more decisively. “No. Not in trouble.”

 

Rhodey sighed deeply, narrowing his eyes at the other man. Now that he’d gotten over his initial surprise, it occurred to him that Tony was swaying on his feet, and his words were coming out slightly slurred.

 

“Tony, are you drunk?”

 

Tony actually had the nerve to look mildly affronted by that. “I don’t drunk and science. Least not important science.”

 

“That statement is not nearly as reassuring as you think it is. How long has it been since you’ve slept?”

 

“Two, three, four days…” Tony waved a hand airily. “’S not the point.”

 

“It kind of is the point. How did you get here?”

 

Tony made a vague gesture in the direction of “outside,” possibly indicating the road. He didn’t elaborate further.

 

If Tony’d had his driver bring him, there was no way he’d have been allowed to attempt his little breaking-and-entering venture. He could only hope the man had taken a cab. Halfway across the state. Well, it wasn’t like Tony stopped to think about money once he got an idea in his head. Though if he _had_ taken a cab, it might still be out there. It was about 50/50 chances whether he’d forgotten to pay or just thrown the entire contents of his wallet at the driver. Rhodey sighed and turned toward the front door.  

 

No cab. Instead, a shiny red sports car sat at the curb. What was he thinking, hoping that Tony might have exhibited a shred of sense?

 

Crossing the yard, he walked around the car, looking it over for damage. Not so much as a ding, so Tony must have somehow made it there without incident. It was more of a relief than he liked to consider, not needing to worry about the possibility that Tony had been out of it enough to leave the scene of an accident. He went around to the driver’s side, opened the door, retrieved the key from the ignition, closed and locked the door, and trudged back inside.

 

Tony wasn’t in the living room anymore. Rhodey deposited the keys in the fruit bowl on the way past, shifting a couple of apples to cover them. If Tony decided to take off, he could at least make sure it was on foot. No way was he letting the man drive, _again,_ like that.

 

He caught up with Tony in the hall. He was just closing the door to the linen closet, looking vaguely confused.

 

“If you’re looking for the bathroom—“ Rhodey started, but Tony was already reaching for the next doorknob. He made a happy noise of discovery when he found it to be the bedroom. “Tony, what are you doing?”

 

“You’re good at patience.” Tony gave him a benevolent pat on the shoulder. “Sleep now, talk later.”

 

“I am good at patience,” he said, very, very patiently. “I’m glad you noticed. But I still want to know what—“

 

But Tony was already halfway across the room, not listening.

 

“Tony, no.” He tried to grab the other man’s arm, to redirect him back toward the living room, but Tony was like an eel. A sleepy, uncoordinated eel, who was now collapsing in his bed, rolling over to pull the comforter around himself. “Tony, that’s _my bed.”_  

 

Tony’s reply was a sleepy grumble. “Use mine.”

 

Right, great. Apparently he’d forgotten they weren’t actually in college anymore. When they were roommates he’d had a tendency to do that when he was drunk or exhausted—collapse into whichever bed happened to be closest, often leaving Rhodey the choice of hauling him bodily to the correct one or making do with Tony’s for the night. It was a miracle none of the kid’s other roommates had killed him before the administration discovered the perfect use for Rhodey’s apparently limitless patience.

 

“I can’t use your bed, because your bed is in _your house,_ and your house is _not even in this county._ Are you even—“ Rhodey stopped, heaving a resigned sigh as he looked down at the man sprawled limply across his bed. “You’re asleep. Great. Guess this means I’m sleeping on the couch.”

 

He jerked open the closet door, not bothering to be particularly quiet as he retrieved a spare blanket and pillow from the top shelf. Then he went over to return the gun to its safe for the night. Standing again, he headed for the door, pillow and blanket under one arm. He paused with one hand on the doorknob to look back, shaking his head.

 

“Right. Fine then. But you and I are having a _talk_ in the morning.”

 

Tony didn’t so much as twitch.

 

-0-0-0-0-

 

Rhodey was working on cooking a pan of scrambled eggs when Tony dragged himself out of the bedroom to collapse on one of the kitchen stools. His bleary gaze travelled aimlessly around the kitchen and living room before settling on the sofa, with the pillow and the blanket, now neatly folded at one end.

 

“You slept on the couch?” He didn’t sound like he was quite firing on all cylinders yet. Rhodey deposited a cup of coffee in his hands, which he started sipping at automatically.

 

“Well yeah, Tony. Where did you think I was going to sleep, with you taking up my entire bed?”

 

Tony blinked. “Spare room?”

 

“Look at this apartment.” Rhodey waved a hand at the space around them. “Where, exactly, would I keep a spare room? Some of us don’t have mansions the size of hotels.”

 

“Oh.” Tony took a few seconds to process that. “I could get you a new apartment…”

 

“I don’t _need_ a new apartment. I hardly spend any time here as it is. What I need is to know what was so important that you felt the need to drive here in the middle of the night, practically drunk with sleep deprivation, instead of just _calling me_ like a rational person.”

 

“You’re right.” Tony ran a hand through his hair, standing abruptly. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—and you’re probably on duty today. It’s—Wednesday—Thursday? Whatever. Anyway. I’ll go.”

 

 _“Tony.”_ Rhodey raised a hand to stop him. “That’s not—I just—I was _worried,_ okay? I _am_ worried. It’s a miracle you didn’t crash, driving in that condition. You’ve gotta take better care of yourself.”

 

“Yeah, okay. Okay. Sorry.” Tony sank back onto the stool, holding the mug in both hands once more.

 

Rhodey sighed. “Okay then. So what was it?”

 

“I made an AI.”

 

“You what?” He frowned.

 

“An AI. Artificial intelligence. It—“

 

“I know what it stands for, Tony. You’ve been talking about it for years. I was actually paying attention. You’re saying you finally went ahead and did it?”

 

“Yeah, I did it. I succeeded. It’s—he’s amazing. An actual, functioning, learning, self-aware artificial intelligence. JARVIS. You’ve gotta come over and meet him sometime. It’s—“

 

Rhodey laughed. “That’s great, man. That’s amazing. Congratulations. I’d offer you a drink, but, y’know, it’s way too early for that, and I’ve got to be on duty in an hour. But later. We’ll go out, celebrate, get a few drinks. And I’ll come over and see it when I can get away.”

 

“Yeah. Okay. Sounds good.” Tony was looking a little more awake, and genuinely sheepish now, coming back down to earth after the high of successful invention. He scratched the back of his neck. “I _am_ sorry. I really should’ve—“

 

Rhodey waved off the apology. “Nah, man, you’re good. Don’t worry about it.” His smile turned more serious as he added, “Your dad would’ve been so proud of you.”

 

Tony looked away, his expression closing off. “Yeah, well.”

 

“He _would_ have,” Rhodey insisted. “Tony—“

 

Tony shook his head. “Look, can we just…”

 

“Yeah, okay. Sorry.” He grabbed a couple of plates from the dish rack. “Breakfast now. And tonight—“

 

Tony grinned wolfishly. “Party time.”

 

Rhodey groaned, turning back to the stove. “When you say it like that, I _know_ I’m going to regret it.”

 

“Aw, come on Rhodey, live a little.”

 

Even with his back turned, Rhodey could just imagine the puppyish, wheedling expression on his face. He snorted.

 

“I think you live enough for the both of us.”

 

“But it’s no fun if I can’t share.”

 

And that… that was why he put up with Tony, and let him steal his bed, and could never quite manage to stay as mad at him as he should.

 

Dumping half the pan of eggs onto a plate, he handed it to Tony.

 

“C’mon. Get some food, and then finish catching up on your sleep while I’m at work. You can tell me all about your baby AI tonight.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Man, I have never in my life been on such a writing roll, turning out stories this quickly. It's really fun.


End file.
